Stepping Stones
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Targets on Purpose

Whenever we want to achieve something, no matter what, then we can benefit from recognising that a target is an important part of that achievement. Without a specific target then we only have a wish or a vague ambition that has not yet been turned into an a deliberate choice. Without a target then we can't commit to action because we have no definition of what to commit to.
What is a target?
In real terms, a target provides 2 main things:
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Our choice - what we are going for.
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Our interest or reason - why we are going for it.
Often we recognise a target as being the 'thing' that we aim to achieve, our objective. By itself the thing that we aim to achieve is relatively useless as it does not provide the motivation that we need to actually complete the task. The motivation to achieve comes from a broader recognition of what our choice represents to us at this point in our life.
To provide a really simple example: I am hungry. I have not eaten for some hours and a mealtime is approaching. I have no readily available food but I do have some money and a limited amount of time available to source some food. This is my basic context that will, in turn, source my motivation.
But! I have several alternatives that come easily to mind that give different potentials for flavour, speed, personal preference, social engagement, break-time support, cost, ease of availability, and so on. I have many options, which is a good thing, but it makes it harder to choose. So long as I have alternative options to achieve the same basic objective (eating in response to hunger) then I cannot have a single target to commit to and I'll potentially starve if I can't select one option above all the others. The aim of considering my options is to potentially identify the preferable single option that I can select as the single option that I will decide is the food-choice that I am going for today. However I make my mind up, and there are many ways that this optimisation selection can be played out, I will be more likely to get some food when I select just one option as my target and commit to it.
So an effective target states my choice and, to provide me the motivation to see this task through, my target recognises why I am choosing it as well as being reasonably clear that my target is well-defined, achievable, and realistic.
Head and Heart
People like to talk about listening to your head or your heart as if these two things are implicitly mutually incompatible. There may be times when it is indeed important to tap into different ways of thinking and being in order to define serious life-purposes and the targets that allow us to work towards them. However, I suggest that we need both the head (to define realistic objectives) and the heart (our passion and motivation) to achieve progress.
With a clear target our passion is directed appropriately. With a clear guiding-mind (head) fuelled ultimately by our emotion (heart) then we can best set targets, achieve those targets, acknowledge our successes and progress, and recognise that even a simple thing like consciously choosing a meal helps to enrich our life and progresses our journey towards our larger 'Life-Purposes'.
Benefits
There are many benefits to knowing what our targets are and consciously picking them:
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Gaining clarity on what we actually want in ways that we can commit to.
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Defining manageable steps to meet larger aims and purposes.
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Making it real: with no targets our wishes are little more than fantasy.
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Growing our achievements and self-confidence over time.
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Growing a chosen sense of self over time (what kind of person are we choosing to 'be').
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Making progress concrete and observable.
Picking Targets
When it comes to personal work (changing habits, personal growth, lifestyle choices, dealing with traumas and fears, etc.) then picking appropriate targets is one of the most important skills that we can develop. We need to select targets that are both effective and achievable. Targets that 'make sense' for us as individuals. Targets that challenge us and motivate us at the same time.
I don't suggest starting with targets that are too simple and easy to achieve, as these prove nothing much at all. Perhaps start with something that you know that you 'can' achieve but is sufficiently challenging that you feel that you'd rather not. To produce deeper changes in life we need to get at least a bit outside our normal comfort-zone.
Problems
Here are some of the symptoms that we are not picking the best targets:
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Procrastination When we find ourselves procrastinating about what to go for or about actually getting on with achieving our target then one possibility is that we are getting stuck on our own potential for regret.
Whenever we are faced with a choice or a commitment then we have something to gain but also something to lose. If we focus more on what we have to lose then we will become reluctant to commit or we will find ourselves second-guessing our own decisions. The commitment needed to actually get something done will be hard to engage with.
The obvious trick for this is to make sure that we focus on the excitement of the opportunity rather than the fear of the loss.
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Distraction When distractions appear that seem to get in the way of achieving our own targets then this can be down to temptations coming up from our subconscious (Automatic Mind). Treat distractions as temptations and use determination or the 'No Temptation' technique to keep on track.
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Apathy Limited commitment or low motivation points to an imbalance between what we are setting as our target and our belief that we can achieve it. Make sure to pick achieveble targets that include an emotional 'want' or 'excitement' to achieve. If the target is too big then we are likely to suffer reduced motivation.
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Unreality Targets that we fail to engage with or fail to achieve may simply be unrealistic. Hoping to lose a great deal of weight overnight is simply not going to happen (without major destructive surgery), and we know it.
Life-Purposes
Developing deeper Life-Purposes is a big topic in itself, which I hope to cover in depth elsewhere, but is important if we want to really identify and achieve meaningful immediate targets. Knowing something about our larger, long-term, fundamental purposes in life makes it much easier to recognise and/or handle individual targets.
Life-Purposes are basically our own personal recognition of what sort of human being we are (or want to become) and what we stand for ethically, materially, and socially.
To explore your own Life-Purposes a little, you can try this simple exercise.
Answer these questions for a number or areas (X) in your life:
(To keep this manageable, try to answer in a single word or sentence).
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What do you hold to be true about ... X?
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What do you regard as your limitations with regard to ... X?
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What do you regard as your 'needs' with regard to ... X?
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What do you want others to associate with you in regard to ... X?
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What do you want to grow in ... X?
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What do you think that you may lose by setting your own life-targets in ... X?
Where: X is
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Yourself.
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Your vocation(s).
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Your social role(s).
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Your partnership(s).
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Your passtime(s).
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Your spirituality.
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Your legacy.
And, after all:
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Your overall life.
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